Whether you like it or not, turning 30 means something. For most, it’s a wake-up call to change direction; for some, a moment to reflect on a foundation of accomplishments already constructed. There is no one, however, that wakes up on that day and feels nothing.
For me, turning 30 was about feeling good in my own skin for the first time. I had had moments in my life before when I’d intellectually tried to convince myself to be more comfortable in my own body and not to care so much about what other people thought…but convincing myself and really feeling it are two very different things.
As my birth month approached, I tried to think of ways I could be more kind to myself and bring in the milestone with some flair. That was when I came up with the idea to have 30 orgasms in 30 days in celebration of my 30th year of life.
I established the guidelines, which were: sex with orgasm every day was preferable, but if for some reason my husband & I were unable to put it together, then three orgasms on my own would count for the day’s check mark (the tally was on the refrigerator). Also, orgasms achieved in excess of this number would not count toward the next day’s total, as that violates the spirit of the idea. However, orgasms could be made up the following day.
With this plan in place, December 1st was rife with anticipation in my household. My husband knew we were starting a strict regimen and was excited to begin our month-long sexventure. That day, he put it to me first thing in the morning and I was able to climax after fishing my vibrator from the nightstand.
So far, so good.
We were going strong until December 4th, when I got my period. My body surges with testosterone around this time, so I was happy to go manual with my orgasms. For the first few days, I watched an absurd amount of porn, and checked off the tally before I’d even brushed my teeth.
After my period, we resumed our schedule with relative ease, but I discovered that the way I was achieving orgasm was extremely routine (same as day one – with help from my little friend) and also, that I often don’t need or want to get off, but would prefer instead to just enjoy the overall feeling (I’m such a girl, I know).
We fell off schedule quickly after that and at one point, I had to lock myself in the bedroom and knock out 12 orgasms in a row. This was also a particularly stressful time for us, as I have been out of work for several months and feverishly trying to find something (anything) to help pay the bills.
There were a couple of particularly tense days, when I really benefitted from having a big O (or 3) in the middle of the day…But just as many days when I thought to myself, “Oh fuck – I haven’t cum yet today, that’s just one more thing on my checklist of shit to do.”
Overall, I am happy that we undertook this experiment, even if I have to declare it a resounding failure. As of Christmas day, I had been without orgasm since December 18th. Rather than crank out a week’s worth at once, I decided to love myself in other ways.
As weird as this sounds, I would really prefer a pedicure over 21 orgasms in a row.
Kendal Calderon is an artist & freelance writer who resides in Honolulu, Hawaii. She writes about Honolulu Budget Events for Examiner.com, her work can also be found on her Permanent Vacation blog. Follow her whimsical & random musings on Twitter as @skimpythoughts.
Image via LucyFrench123's Flickr